Do you feel the need to make your coming out? To show your entourage your true identity and you want it to happen in the best possible way?
This is normal and we understand you. We will help you to announce your membership in the gay community in the best possible way so you don't have to hide from your parents that when you go out, it's to go to your city's Gay Pride!
Coming out in the LGBT community is often a complicated event because of the reactions it can provoke. Announcing our attraction to people of the same sex, our willingness to change our sexual identity can be a real exercise for some people.
In this article you will learn 5 ways to make your Coming Out:
- The LGBT flag trick
- The technique of the letter
- The story of a friend's cousin's neighbor
- The Two-Person Plan
After that, coming out won't be a fear for you anymore and you will be ready to announce it to your friends and family! (of course these tips are suitable for everyone, gay and lesbian as well as transgender people)
Let's start now.
5 - Coming Out with an LGBT flag
This first method is very common in French-speaking countries. It consists in hanging an LGBT flag above your bed, your desk, in a place where you know it will be visible by the people who will come to your room. For this flag, take the flag of your sexual orientation or gender identity, why? Because it will show that this is not a phase, that you don't give yourself a style but that you know very well who you are and that you identify with this flag (lesbian, transgender, non-binary, gay...). When a person enters your room and asks you the famous question "Why do you have this rainbow flag in your room? This will be the occasion to start the discussion. It is important to know that some parents are afraid because they don't understand, and this is the precise moment when it is up to you to help them understand and therefore accept. Remember that when your parents were your age, the lgbt community was not as present, so sometimes it's new for them. Take all the time you need to make sure they understand!
4 - Coming Out with a letter
Here is our second method to come out to your loved ones. This one is a little more reserved to the shy people who tend to lose their means during the taking of lyrics. If you consider yourself as such, read carefully. If you think you won't have the strength to announce it orally, you can write a letter in which you will say absolutely everything you feel (what you live in everyday life, why you needed to talk about it...). It's an opportunity to say what you would never say in person. Of course it is not a question of asking your parents to become instant lgbt allies or to participate in obtaining the rights of gays, speak united. You can prepare your letter in several days to make sure you don't forget anything and have it read by a trusted friend. Once written, the little technique is to put the letter in the mailbox in the morning, when your parents come to pick up the mail, and you can then react with them to this announcement. We know that some parents are sometimes closed to the LGBT community, but don't forget that they are your parents, that they know you, that if you wrote this letter very well, you shouldn't be afraid. Because people who are afraid tend to have doubts, or rather people who look at someone who is afraid think that, you have to be sure of yourself. We know it's not easy, if you think your parents' reaction might be a problem, read our third tip!
If you would like us to create a blog with sample letters for coming out, please let us know your comments and let us know what you think of our advice!
3 - COMING OUT WITH A STORY
This new trick is very useful to analyze the reaction of those around you. If you have a doubt about the open-mindedness of one of your parents or friends, this one is for you! During a meal, tell the story of a friend's coming out (if possible, a friend that your parents know and appreciate, you'll understand later) and explain that his parents reacted very badly when he announced his homosexuality and that the rest went very badly (don't hesitate to adapt this "bad reaction" to your liking according to what might make your parents think about it, such as the fact that they punished or were violent with the friend in question). Once this is done, start the debate and analyze your parents' reaction. You will know from their reactions whether they are ready to hear what you have to say. If you see them expressing empathy for your friend, talking about how they are free to love whoever they want, that's a good sign and if you like what you hear, this is your chance to go there and talk about your sexuality or identity!
If your parents agree with the friend's parents' bad reaction, then they're not ready yet. So you'll still need time to tell them, to prepare them.
2 - COMING OUT WITH A FRIEND
We are getting closer to the end, here is the penultimate technique! This one consists in coming out accompanied. Ask someone close to you to be present, someone your parents know and appreciate (and if possible a heterosexual person). This way of making your announcement allows you to have someone to support you, someone who can help you when you are in front of your parents. The main advantage is that your parents are less likely to react badly if they see someone close to them supporting their child. The goal is to show that you are confident and that your friends accept it.
If your daily life is difficult at home or in your surroundings, if you regularly face homophobic remarks, you can contact The Trevor Project which supports and accompanies people prone to homophobia. Here is their phone number: 1-866-488-7386.
1 - COMING OUT WITH PROUD LGBT
This last piece of advice is actually worth thousands, why? Because it's about joining the private LGBT group on Facebook! A place where you will soon be able to find members of the English LGBT community, our team is leading this group to be as close as possible to our community. Coming out" sections will be regularly created to help lgbt people who still haven't managed to come out. Those who have already come out will be there to help as many people in difficulty as possible!
Unfortunately, this page is under creation! And yes, you know that Proud doesn't do things by halves and therefore takes the time to always offer quality for his community! That's why we invite you to come and visit this page regularly to keep you informed about the evolution of this famous page. follow Proud LGBT on facebook so you don't miss anything!
To end on a positive note, don't forget that the most important thing is to be happy, if you feel good, if you are sure of your choices. Most of your loved ones will be able to support you!
Attention very important!
Whatever your sexual orientation or gender identity, we want to hear your opinion on this 100% gay blog! Write a short note just below to thank our editor Julia for her work and the help she brings to the LGBT community!